Don’t ask us how, but somehow in the Geeks of the Round Back Channel chat we got onto the subject of horror stories and all of us being in one. Since we happen to know a damn good author, Giovanni Russano decided to actually make it happen. So, submitted for your approval, is a horror story starring your favorite editors/hosts/vidcast guests from the Geeks of the Round crew.
This story is not for kids. It is a horror story, which means that it is bloody and violent at times. It also includes other forms of adult content including drug use and implied nudity. If you have any problems with any of that, please do not read this story. Geeks of the Round and its staff have no intention or want to offend anyone with this story, but if you are then that’s on you. You can download the full story, in PDF form, via the link in the image below. You can also have Mr. Russano kill you on paper as well; just sign up here. Lastly, if you like what you read here, you can find his books at http://www.rottinghorse.com. Mr. Russano did not ask for us to endorse him, and we paid full price for the story; we just really like his work and figured he deserved a shout out.
Here is an excerpt from the story:
“No,” Charles said with his old man voice and crossed his arms over his chest. “I’m staying right here. I’ve had a good enough night, thank you. More partying is not worth the risk of entering that building and getting raped or murdered or stepping on a needle and getting Hep-C. No way. Not doing it. You wanna go? Fine. Have fun. Bye bye.” He waved and smiled sarcastically.
“Dude, chill out,” Mr. Lou tried. “Don’t get so worked up over it. I’ll stay here with you and wait. If everything is fine then someone will come back out and get us,” he paused and thought, “Why is the first place you go always rape?”
“It’s a legitimate thing to fear!” Charles fired back.
Click on the picture below for the PDF and Enjoy!
Square Enix hit the stage at E3 this year, here’s what we thought of their showing:
Knuckles Goldberg: Just Cause 3.
Rise of The Tomb Raider, Design Trailer.
Lara Croft Go.
Final Fantasy VII Remake, the same trailer from yesterday….really?
Kingdom Hearts X Unchained for Mobile Devices.
Kingdom Hearts III Gameplay Trailer.
World of Final Fantasy.
World of Final Fantasy.
Star Ocean 5 Gameplay Trailer.
Deus Ex: Mankind Divided.
So we got a new console RPG announcement in Project SETSUNA, but not much, as we only got still shots, which tells me we probably won’t be seeing this for a few years. I was disappointed that they just showed the same video for Final Fantasy VII Remake from yesterday, but I was absolutely pissed off we did not get a Final Fantasy XV release date. Square Enix definitely had a strong showing at E3 this year despite giving us The Last Guardian-treatment again with FFXV. Also I don’t know if I was feeling the Star Ocean 5 battle system they showed, I’m hoping that is still a work in progress.
DeAno Jackson: Between this and Nintendo’s event, I could have just stayed in bed and enjoyed the extra few hours of sleep. I was hoping that they’d have more from the Final Fantasy VII Remake in their own conference, but instead they just played the exact same trailer we saw yesterday. Just Cause 3 looked good, Star Ocean 5 looked good, Rise of the Tomb Raider looked good, and then there was a bunch of stuff that really didn’t do it for me. It was a by-the-numbers showing, but nothing that really had a wow-factor to me. Like Knuckles said, we didn’t even get a release date for Final Fantasy XV! Truly disappointing.
So a strong showing, but not good enough in the eyes of our crew. What did you all think? Let us know in the comments!
The last day of conferences kicked off E3 today with Nintendo’s Digital Event, here’s what we thought:
Knuckles Goldberg: Star Fox Zero.
The Legend of Zelda: Tri Force Heroes.
Hyrule Warriors Legends.
Metroid Prime: Federation Force.
Fire Emblem Fates.
Fatal Frame: Maiden of Blackwater.
Genei Ibun Roku.
Xenoblade Chronicles X.
Chibi-Robo! Zip Lash.
Animal Crossing Happy Home Designer.
Animal Crossing Amiibo Festival.
Yoshi’s Woolly World.
Mario & Luigi: Paper Jam.
Mario Tennis: Ultra Smash.
Super Mario Maker.
Super Mario Montage for the 30th Anniversary, LetsSuperMario.com. Not a game, but an invitation to submit your own videos which in turn will help the charity Operation Smile.
All in all this was a fairly disappointing conference, and was very 3DS heavy, with a few Wii U titles, but even a new Star Fox isn’t enough to convince me to buy a Wii U. Also surprising that there was no new Pokemon announcement.
DeAno Jackson: I was really hoping that they would introduce a new console. It was an out there hope, but that’s really what I wanted to see. The Wii U simply can’t hang with the types of games that are being made this generation, and I wanted to see Nintendo recognize that and fix it. Alas, it is what it is. Kinda annoyed that I got up so early just for…this.
While we clearly weren’t impressed by Nintendo’s offerings, but we’d love to know what you think. Let us know in the comments!
To wrap up today’s shows we had the most anticipated conference from Sony for the PlayStation, here’s what happened:
Knuckles Goldberg: Sony decided to open the show with The Last Guardian, which has been in development since 2007 and was supposed to come out in 2011. It’s great that it’s finally coming out but wow, it was really showing its age.
Guerrilla Games came on to show off their new IP Horizon Zero Dawn which looked really cool and really bizarre. Why would you hunt robots like you were hunting food?
Street Fighter V.
We finally got to see more of No Man’s Sky.
Dreams…put me to sleep.
Destiny…hey wait a minute, that game’s been out for a while now.
Assassin’s Creed Syndicate gets some new story info as the playable female lead Evie and they announced some PlayStation exclusive missions.
World of Final Fantasy, which looks like a cutesy mash up of all the final fantasies.
Ok Sony waited 45 minutes to make a worthwhile announcement and holy shit, Final Fantasy VII Remake is official. It’s coming first to PlayStation 4. We actually heard an unverified rumor of this at midnight last night but didn’t want to say anything because there was no source, but obviously it was real. Unfortunately it’s only a timed exclusive.
Shenmue 3…maybe. All you have to do is get it funded. Hey Sony, maybe YOU should fund the game you’re showing at your damn press conference!
Batman Arkham Knight which is out next week!
Project Morpheus, PlayStation Music, and PlayStation Vue was showcased, including RIGS, a game for Project Morpheus.
Call of Duty Black Ops 3.
Disney Infinity 3.0.
Star Wars Battlefront.
Uncharted 4, ouch, the demo froze and had to be restarted.
What a major let down by Sony. They had two huge announcements, one was obviously FFVII, but it’s not exclusive, and the other was we have to crowdfund Shenmue 3. Their non demo for Project Morpheus by barely showing non VR footage of a game sucked. Microsoft definitely won this year with the Hololens. Then to add salt to the wounds, Uncharted 4 froze on stage and had to be restarted. Just embarrassing, but when it didn’t freeze it did look amazing.
DeAno Jackson: Sony had a fairly decent showing. I think Microsoft did better, having plenty of first party games actually coming this year, but Sony did okay. Starting with showing The Last Guardian was cool, but they practically broke the internet with the Final Fantasy VII Remake announcement. People have wanted that for years, and it’s damned cool to see that finally happening. Also really liked what I saw in Horizon Zero Dawn; I love me some new IPs, particularly when they’re looking this good. Still, there were some questions. Namely, where in the hell is Sony Santa Monica!? Are we ever going to find out what they’re working on? Also I have no idea what Dreams is; doesn’t seem like it’s for me. As I said at the beginning it was a decent showing, but I feel that it could have been a hell of a lot better.
What did you all think of Sony’s offerings presented at this press event? Let us know in the comments!
Ubisoft woke us the hell up with some great announcements, here’s what we thought:
Knuckles Goldberg: South Park: The Fractured But Whole…y crap! I was so sad when Matt Stone & Trey Parker said they’d never make another video game after The Stick of Truth when THQ went under and caused all kinds of problems for the release of that game, so I was all smiles when I saw this because they made a really special RPG and I can’t wait to get my hands on this new one.
For Honor, some really great cinematics here and I was dubious of the actual gameplay until I saw it, it looks really good. I’m interested in what kind of game modes there are and how many variations of fighting there are.
The Crew Wild Run.
Trials Fusion Awesome Level Max expansion pack looked…..well see for yourself.
Tom Clancy’s The Division, set to release March 8th 2016.
Anno 2205 looks promising, something like The Sims or Civilization but in space.
Please someone take the microphone away from Aisha Tyler, I don’t know how much more of her saying “rickets” I can take. Also Just Dance 2016 looks awful because it involves dancing.
Tom Clancy’s Rainbow Six Siege.
Assassin’s Creed Syndicate. This series conflicts me. Assassin’s Creed used to be my favorite franchise, then AC3 happened. It was awful. Then ACIV Black Flag came out, and that was considerably better but didn’t restore my faith in the franchise, and I didn’t even touch that buggy mess that was AC Unity. I’m going to be very weary of this when it comes out and I will definitely wait and see how it fares after release before getting it myself.
Last, which really impressed me, was Tom Clancy’s Ghost Recon Wildlands, which to me played like GTA V with a more gritty setting and realistic tone, and it just may be the first game with Tom Clancy in the title that I actually consider buying.
Can’t say I liked even half of what was shown during Ubisoft‘s conference, but I love that South Park has a new game coming, For Honor looked promising, and Ghost Recon looked great. And if Anno 2205 really is anything like Civilization I’ll definitely be picking it up.
DeAno Jackson: Much much better than EA’s press event. Knuckles didn’t like Aisha Tyler hosting the event, but as far as I’m concerned I’ll take anyone over Mister
Cocaine Caffeine. The Division, as usual, really looked good and held my attention – as did most of Ubisoft’s offerings – but Ghost Recon Wildlands absolutely blew me away. I want to play that. As soon as possible. Overall, it was a really great showing from Ubisoft, and now I’m awake and ready for Sony’s press event!
We hope you enjoyed this press event as much as we did, and we’d love to hear your opinions. LEt us know in the comments!